| Feb. 16th, 2006 @ 11:15 pm blog for psych of love |
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Wiki # 4 Attachment. What does it mean to be attached to someone? Is it a positive or a negative thing to be attached to someone? In the book, “The Developing Mind” by Daniel Siegal the attachment issue was solely based on children and how they are attached to their parents. I think a very common response to this book is that the readers will often analyze their relationships with their parents when they were children. As a reader, I could not help but to analyze my own life, as I often do with psychology books. I don’t think I’m alone in that. I found myself trying to remember what my parents were like when I was younger. Having only my mother around all the time, because my dad left when I was 3 months old, I can only think about my relationship with my mother. I know that she was very attached to me when I was young because taking care of me was helping here through her divorce. In turn I know that I am attached to her still. I think being the youngest has an impact on the attachment issue too. My mother says that because she was the youngest, of seven, and she was the most attached to her parents. I have a very strong connection with my mother that I am extremely proud of. It’s very depressing to see individuals who do not appreciate their mother’s enough. Then again, that all goes back to their childhood and if their mother neglected them or not. The real question is, how attached should a parent be? How do you know when to stop and back off to prevent from smothering the child? I’m not sure if giving a child too much attention can be a negative thing. The attachment between a child and a parent can affect that child’s other relationships. I believe that if the mother was very affectionate with her children, then those children would transfer that affection into other relationships such as a love interest. This can be both good and bad. One problem I used to have when getting into a relationship with a boy was becoming attached way too quickly which would cause them to be scared and leave. I always believed that boys just didn’t like me but I eventually realized that I was going to fast emotionally for them. After I realized this, I’ve understood that it is perfectly ok to be attached; it just needs to be in small amounts and not too overwhelming for the other person.
--Doogy 2/10/06 edit discussion
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